Do You, Be You / by Diamond Coleman

When you compare yourself to others, you set yourself up for self-destruction. There are very few things in life that are worse for your well-being and peace of mind than letting the actions of other people consume you, and doing so usually leaves you feeling inadequate.

The problem with comparing yourself to another individual is that it’s entirely way too easy. When you’re not where you want to be in your life and someone else is living the way you envision yourself living, it’s only natural for you to reevaluate your current situation and think hypothetically. Sometimes, this can even motivate you to work more arduously to achieve an objective. But what we must all remember is that each person’s destination and the path he or she takes to arrive there is different. There is more than one way to achieve a goal and no expiration date for one’s arrival to that goal; in most cases, it’s never too late to go after what you desire. Once we fully understand these fundamental facts of life, we will be incredibly more secure in our abilities and aspirations and stop beating ourselves up for not quite yet ascertaining what it is we want to do with our lives.
Another thing to keep in mind is that we never truly know what obstacles a person had to go through in order to get to where he or she is now in his or her life. Many people’s paths to success were paved with strife, trip-ups, deceit and tribulations that you were never meant to experience or witness. That is why it is that person’s journey and not your own. Each of us has a destiny, and the way that we get there is completely individualistic. There's probably some person whom you graduated with last year who is making $80,000 a year while you’re still struggling to make ends meet. But do you know if he or she is truly happy? Does he or she have an unbreakable support system like yours? These are the questions you have to ask when you find yourself descending into the abysmal, downward spiral of comparing yourself to another individual and making yourself feel substandard.
Of course, there will always be someone who will attain one of your ultimate goals before you do. That’s just human nature. And that person may be 10 years younger with less experience than you, but who the hell cares? That is his or her path that he or she was meant to take; you have your own unique path that was made for only you. If you allot too much of your precious time brooding over why you’re not in the same place as someone else, you'll only be deterred from your path. Do your soul a favor and nurture it by giving it the affection and attention it needs. That's the only way you'll grow and prosper.